Moving in the right direction

After 5 days of Billy eating like a demon ( not to mention pooping even more), but failing to put on weight we seemed to have turned a corner and a weighing yesterday put him at 6lb 2.3oz so I’m now beginning to relax a little.

As for Billy’s bilis they haven’t been checked for a few days but all nurses / doctors / lactation consultants seem very unworried about it. So less for me to worry about to.

Since Billy was born I’ve been asked numerous times if the blog will go on.  I had originally thought that no it won’t, that my last entry would be one about Billy’s birth, but I’ve already past that milestone. So in short, yes – the blog will go on. 

Please bear with me however as chances are some of the posts will be a day or so behind real time – trying to keep it up to date with what’s happening in our family simultaneously is just not possible with a new born who needs feeding every 2.5 hours, following by a pump session. I only just about wash the bottles and have to start over again.

I’ll also change the title (let’s face now I’m no longer on bedrest it’s hardly appropriate) and probably alter the subject matter slightly.  After all, the tales about my daily family life, now with hopefully the drama removed, or at least toned down, I doubt will anywhere near as interesting as it has been. But don’t worry tales about Billy and his big sister will continue to feature.

Today, I’m already feeling a sense of satisfaction. It’s 9:15am on a Saturday morning, we’re all up, I’m dressed – make up included. Billy’s already had one feed, breakfast has been served and one wash is already nearly completion.  Next stop is bath time for Billy, which Jemima is going to help with, then a walk to the park and Starbucks before some friends pop in for a visit. I can’t tell you how excited I am about going for a walk for the first time in four months.

Billy and his Bilis

All newborns are susceptible to jaundice, but when premature the chances of jaundice setting in are even more likely.

Having been delivered at just 36 weeks, Billy has indeed got jaundice.  They measure the severity of it by using a monitor to check the bilirubin levels – known as bili numbers or Bilis for short.

On day 1 he was in the high intermediate category, but stable enough to come home.  By day 3 he’d dropped to the upper scale of the low intermediate level and yesterday he’d dropped even further and was towards the bottom of the low intermediate risk category. So, each day his risk level is reducing, although his actual bili number is rising – risk level is based on number of hours/days since birth as well as the actual number. 

Yesterday, Billy’s level was 13.1.  The aim is to get it below 10. They way to do this is a cyclical pattern of feed, pee and poop. Basically they pee and poop out the bilirubins.  This combined with the fact that he’s still losing weight (born at 6lb 10oz, weighing 6lb 2oz yesterday) means we’re on a 2.5 – 3 hour round the clock feeding /  pumping cycle.  Little change here as we’ve had to be waking him every 3 hours since birth anyway.

It’s his weight gain, or rather lack of that’s worrying me now. Despite the above feeding frenzy over the last 24 hours, he’s still losing weight. He’s not yet lost 10% of his birth weight which is considered normal but we’re not far off.  I have a horrid feeling that I’m about to hear the words ‘failure to thrive’ from the lactation consultant – every mother’s nightmare.

We’re now feeding every 2.5 hours and increasing his feed – he’s comfortably draining 2oz per bottle which is what we’re offering him, so fingers crossed he just needs a bit more a bit more frequently.

Billy’s Story

 

So, after an anxious couple of months and a few false starts, Billy (William if you want to be official about it!) James Gordon Tamblyn entered into this world at 6:05 on Saturday morning, weighing an impressive 6lb 10oz.

A little bit about his entrance into the world, but not too much for obvious reasons. My labor actually got off to a rather amusing start – or at least it would have been amusing had it not been either labor or mine!

  I suspected I was leaking some fluid on Friday morning, but couldn’t be 100% sure so figured I’d wait and see for a couple of hours before calling my OB, knowing that that the minute I mentioned this to them, they would want me in labor and delivery and I couldn’t quite face yet another fruitless visit.  At the same time, Tambo’s car was also slowly but surely breaking down so we needed to take it to the garage, which meant me following him so I could take him back to the office.  To add to the drama that was about to unfold I also had Jemima at home with me on Friday as she had a fever so couldn’t go to day care.

I mentioned to him casually that I thought my waters might be breaking so to keep his phone on.  I got home, got out of the car and by the time I’d walked round to get out Jemima, the flood gates had literally opened. Calmly I managed to get us inside, told Jemima to go and play in her play room while Mummy went to the bathroom. At which point she noticed my ‘flood’ and asked if I’d wet my pants.  I told her that I thought Noddy was coming out soon. This obviously spooked her as a few minutes later I heard a whimper outside the bathroom, only to find Jemima had had an accident – her first in nearly a year.  So she was standing in a puddle of water, I was standing in a puddle of water (which was still increasing) and I’m trying to keep her calm, keep myself calm and call Tambo – but my phone was making no connection whatsoever. 

I then had the job of cleaning up both Jemima and I which when you’re trickling is not so easy. So I’m wandering around the house to get a change of clothes for Jemima (who is also beside herself that she’d had an accident) whilst leaving a little trickle behind me. Finally, we’re both clean and dry, I’ve made contact with Tambo and he’s in a cab on the way home (remember he’s got no car!) and my next job is to call labor and delivery and arrange for someone to take Jemima – a sick Jemima at that. 

With our neighbor away I was about to take one of my friends up on their many offers of help when the moment came. But alas, made two phone calls to friends that don’t work so knew they were around and about with their children – but got two no answers. I then had no choice but to be calling someone who was at work.  Heather very calming took up the challenge and was here within 30 mins, ready to take Jemima – who was by now excited as it meant a playdate and a sleepover with her best friend Rebecca.  Heather, I’ve told you this already but I’m so grateful for your help – thank you again so much and apologies for pulling you away for work. I’m humbled and honored that I’ve got friends who would do this for me. I hope you get around to reading this.

Tambo arrived home shortly after and we made our way to hospital and by which time the flood and trickling had stopped– or so I thought. We got out of the car at the hospital and the floodgates opened once again and I had to make the embarrassing walk through the hospital looking as if I’d wet myself. Ok so we’re in a maternity ward and it’s no doubt happened many times before, but trust me it’s still embarrassing – and the reception area was packed. Thankfully the nurse quickly bought me some ‘modesty’ blankets.

That’s the funny part. The rest, not so amusing I can tell you.  First there was no room available so we were put in a kind of ‘holding room’ where the traffic was high and nurses kept popping in to look for this/quickly grab that. And by now I was beginning to get quite strong contractions and we were all anxious to get the cerclage out.  I was finally moved into a room, and the cerclage was removed, thankfully by my doctor without an epidural as she suspected would be needed. At this point, we’re all expecting a baby to be delivered within a couple of hours. Noddy, however, obviously had other ideas. 

Having been contracting pretty regularly for the last 3 months, the minute the cerclage was removed all contractions stopped. And I mean stopped. Not even a flicker on the monitor from my ‘irritable uterus’. A few hours passed and we opted for some Petocin to get things going. Which it did, pretty quickly and the dose was gradually increased and for a while all was going quite well and once again we thought we’d have a baby relatively shortly. Little did we know. 

The petocin was working too well and within a couple of hours I was contracting about every 30 – 60 seconds, with contractions lasting about a minute.  Neither me or Noddy was getting any time to recover in between and following each contraction his heart beat was dropping significantly.  So the petocin was turned off. By this time, I was in significant pain and in need of some sort of relief. However, I said to myself if I’m moving along nicely and I’m about 6-7cm dilated I’ll skip the epidural and literally push on through.  Needless to say I was examined and was only 3cm.  My response, get the epidural NOW! 

For those that have experienced childbirth in the UK, where getting an epidural is not only discouraged, but once needed can take significant time to be administered,  let me put this request into context.  Having made the decision, I was being prepped within minutes and I’m not kidding inside of 15 mins the doctor had arrived, I’d had a footlong needle put into my back, Tambo had nearly passed out (he’s not good with needles) and I was blissfully pain free. Again, to give context, it’s takes a minimum of 45 mins to order a meal at the hospital.  Here if you order and epidural, you get an epidural and fast.  I’m still undecided if this is a good thing or not.

And I’m equally undecided if my decision to have one was a good, or indeed the correct one.  There is no way I could have delivered naturally as I did with Jemima but it definitely slowed things down and made the final hurdle (i.e. the pushing) significantly harder.  Being unable to feel, but still move (to a degree) your legs is a strange feeling and one I don’t want to repeat.  Also, trying to push when you can’t feel anything below your belly button is not as easy as it sounds.  Noddy’s head was turned to the right, so he was being somewhat stubborn about exiting and my pushes were proving fruitless. Eventually we opted to reduce the epidural by half which certainly made a difference and finally a couple of hours later, Noddy, now known as Billy, arrived into this world. My expected swift delivery, turned into about 13 hours of active labor to the amazement of all doctors and nurses – and myself.

Being delivered at just 36 weeks, Billy is classed as late preterm and therefore NICU nurses were needed in the delivery room and sadly he was given straight to them, rather than to me.  But it didn’t take long before he was cleaned up, looking good and was handed to me for a brief cuddle before he was taken down to the NICU.  All babies born under 36 weeks have to be watched for 6 hours in the NICU before being left with Mum.

Six hours passed and I’d still not heard anymore about Billy. A few enquiries later I was advised he was having problems holding his temperature so needed to spend time under the heat lamp but was now doing well. I think it was about 2pm when he was finally bought up to my room.

For the next 8 hours we both recovered nicely and were discharged from hospital on Sunday morning and all safely home by just after noon.

At this point, complete and utter chaos set in – I’m now telling me myself this has progressed to organized chaos!

Four weeks to go at worst

Following today’s OB appointment I have an induce date – 7th September.  I had hoped it would be sooner, i.e. 25th August, the day after the cerclage is due to be removed, but sadly they won’t induce before 39 weeks without an amnio to check Noddy is fully developed.  As keen as I am to have Noddy, I’m unsure I want to go through with an amnio.  Aalthough at that point there are no risk, it’s still a needle going through the tummy.

I find all this slightly ironic as the next sentence she said was that ‘well, if you have a baby now, he’s fully developed now so it’s really good that we’ve got this far’.  Quickly followed by 'keep it up with the modified bedrest’ 

Well, I haven’t been as good on the bedrest as I should have been throughout this whole pregnancy, particularly in the last 7 days since they said they wanted me back on moderate bedrest.  They way I see it, each check up is showing no change to my cervix. I’m ready to have a baby, judging by the contractions by body is pretty much ready (at least it would be if it wasn’t being pumped full of drugs to fool it otherwise) and therefore I’m not about to sit back and do nothing. I’d rather be doing lots so that a) the cerclage is removed before 24th Aug b) the baby arrives pretty promptly after the cerclage is removed as scheduled.

 

The OB also looked at me as if I was quite stark raving mad when I said I didn’t really want an epidural. According to her, if the cerclage is removed before 8/24 and therefore in hospital, rather than as scheduled at the clinic under a local, she’s recommending I have an epidural for it as labor would undoubtedly follow quite quickly.  Her logic being ‘why would you want to feel the pain?’. They don’t seem to get the logic here that surely gravity and moving around during labor has got to count for something.  I get the impression that if I want it I’ll be able to request an epidural quicker than I would a cheese sandwich – and it’s food on demand at the hospital here! 

So, whilst I know it’s best for Noddy to stay put until 24th August, it’s best for mum if he comes out before 7th September. Hopefully between the two of us we’ll reach a compromise somewhere in the middle. Unfortunately for Noddy I (like to think at any rate) have a small element of control over the situation, hopefully putting me at a slight advantage. I’ve already booked an appointment with my reflexologist on 8/25 when she’ll work all major labor points.  And I’ve planned a hot curry and fresh pineapple for dinner that night.

I’m ready – my body is not!

I’ve spent the last 15 weeks preying this baby doesn’t come any day now. I’m now doing a full 360.

Every day is getting increasingly harder, as a result I’m getting increasingly grumpier.

I was told on Monday to not be so concerned about contractions but instead to worry about cramps, changes in bowel movements, increase in pressure.

I woke up yesterday at dawn with all of these.  My mid-morning the pressure was increasing so I opted to call the doctor who sent me off the the specialist to check the length of my cervix.  I honestly thought this time was the real deal – labor could be delayed no longer.  I was expecting the cerclage to be removed and told to go home and wait for proper labor to start.

How wrong I was!  Despite the cramps and the contractions, the back ache etc there is still no change to my cervix. I can’t tell you how uncomfortable I am. To top it all it’s pushing 80 degrees outside, so about 75 degrees inside, my fingers are swollen, my feet are swollen, I have constant back ache, I can’t seem to lie on my left side anymore without getting sharp stabbing pains in my back, so my right side is taking all the weight is obviously less than happy about the whole thing.  I stand up and start to get light headed as I can feel, and see all the blood rush down to my feet – if I’m standing they are bright red from the mid-calf down.

The advice of the specialist – take more drugs. I’m now able to add Terbutaline to my daily drug regime – 2 pills every four hours.  This means that on a good day I’m taking upwards of 20 pills. Apparently all doing now harm to the baby but I can’t help but think he’ll come out addicted to something.

It’s unlikely they will remove the cerclage until 8/24 as scheduled, unless I get too uncomfortable.  Apparently, I’m not uncomfortable enough already!  So I have at least another 3 weeks of this and I’m beginning to think it will be just my luck that I’ll go all they way to my due date and beyond. 

I’m trying to just sleep and eat my way though it whilst maintaining a happy positive attitude but the sad reality is that I’m just grumpy- very grumpy and incredibly fed up!

Sunday 1st August: The good, the bad and the ugly

I’ll start with the ‘Good’.

Sunday was the day for my pre-baby party which my friends Jen and Heather very very kindly organized.  I was reluctant at first – being British baby showers don’t really fall within my radar too much, particularly for a second baby.  But I thought hey, I’m never going to get this opportunity again and if nothing else its a darn fine reason to spend some quality time with my girlfriends. So I agreed, under the following conditions:

1) It is not to be called a baby shower – we settled on Fashionista pre-baby party

2) Sparkly shoes required

3) Absolutely no games

4) No gifts

Jen negotiated a hard bargain and agreed to give me 3 out of 4 of the above. I lost out on no gifts, but she did agree to my condition that gifts if brought to the party would not be opened until after Noddy is born. I’m afraid I’m just too superstitious.

We had a lovely afternoon which consisted of Champagne and nibbles at Jen’s house before we headed out to lunch at Bin on the Lake – a beautiful lakeside restaurant in Kirkland.  The weather cooperated nicely so we had a great table overlooking the marina and the food, the service and the generosity of the staff was amazing – including a complimentary bottle of Prosecco and a mocktail for me. Naturally I also enjoyed some the Prosecco – I mean I’m pregnant not a glutton for punishment!  And we all looked so gorgeous in our fabulous dresses and beautiful shoes. Of course, I took this an opportunity to give my wedding shoes a much needed outing – and it felt so good.

A huge thank you to Jen and Heather for organizing – all the little touches such as the table decorations and pre-addressed thank you cards are so appreciated. And thank you to everyone else for coming and for giving up precious weekend family time (although one reason whey I love you all is because I know you’re all only too willing to give the Dads some quality time with the kids!). And of course, thanks in advance for the gifts – official thank yous will come once Noddy has arrived safely. 

So moving on to the ‘Bad’.

Whether it was the champagne, the excitement or just pure coincidence by 10pm on Sunday night Ben and I were making our way to Labor and Delivery – complete with my pre-packed hospital bag.

I started contracting about 7pm but they weren’t too frequent so I put it down to dehydration. Hence I  downed a few glasses of water, lay on my side and rested. By 8:30 they were coming approx. every 5 minutes lasting approximately 30 seconds.  Ben and I agreed to give it another hour before calling the doctor which would inevitably lead to a subsequent call to Allison asking her to come and stay with Jemima.  By 9:30 there was no improvement and they were getting longer, lasting approx. 45 secs.  So we made the call – and thankfully it was my OB who was on call. Knowing my history she immediately wanted me to come in – she didn’t want to run the risk of me contracting against the cerclage without being closely monitored.

By the time we got to hospital I was contracting every 3 mins, and they were increasing in intensity, if not length. We were all beginning to think this was the real thing . And had we not acted when we did, I believe that I probably would have ended up going into labor properly.

But thanks to the joys of modern medicine contractions were stopped after a number of heavy doses of Terbutaline. For those of you that have every had this drug  it’s not pleasant causing hot flashes, racing heart and the shakes. However, it is a far better alternative to Magnesium Sulphate, the side effects of which are even worse. So having been poked in the arm numerous times, poked and examined in places you don’t really want to be poked and given a shot in the bum (steroids to speed up the development of Noddy’s lungs – now that’s a shot that hurts!) and put on an IV I was finally admitted and Ben released to come home just before 3am, safe in the knowledge that labor, although not off the table, was not immediately imminent.

By yesterday afternoon, following 2 further doses of Terbutaline contractions had almost stopped and a check up from the specialist showed there had been some change in the my cervix and while she believes labor is brewing, it’s not imminent and we’re better off leaving the cerclage in for as long as we possibly can.  I was finally discharged at 5pm, just in time for us all to go and pick up Jemima.

So there are the facts. My thoughts on the above, and what I think we’ll happen. I predict we have two more trips to hospital still to do. The first will be at the early signs of labor which they’ll stop as they did above and then remove the cerclage. The second trip will not be far behind when I go into labor proper and we actually have a baby.  When all this will happen is anyone’s guess but I highly doubt I’ll last until my due date of 10 September, in fact most of the time I doubt I’ll last until 24th August which is when the cerclage is scheduled to be removed.

But in the meantime, at least I’m home, back on modified bed rest.  Yes I’m still contracting regularly, particularly in the evening but they’ve increased the dose of the drugs I’m on and unless the contractions become significantly painful (i.e I need to stop what I’m doing kind of pain) and last more than 60 secs they are not concerned. Instead I’m to look out for any cramping (the true sign of early labor which was news to me) and of course bleeding, the bloody show and my waters breaking.   I’m sincerely hoping that these when they happen will conveniently take place between 8am and 5pm Monday to Friday when Jemima is at day care and we can avoid dragging anyone away from their beds in the middle of night, or interrupting their weekends.  Thank you again to everyone who’s offered to be on call day or night, and apologies in advance for the hassle I’m sure we’re likely to cause.